Featured “Nobody Wants Your Opinion”

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by leon_90, Jan 11, 2019 at 09:42.

  1. leon_90

    leon_90
    Columnist for RaceDepartment Staff Premium

    Messages:
    626
    Ratings:
    +837
    jim_carrey_typing.jpg

    Threads and topics can get heated; here is how to cool them down.



    As of late, it is becoming more and more difficult to voice an opinion without it being almost immediately rejected by the end receiver. Having a view about something is considered, today, a problematic affair. How to voice your intentions, your ideas, your thoughts about a subject, without offending someone else in the process? Many tend to cast themselves away into a vote of silence, others just do not care and speak their minds freely anyway, often making the problem worse. This issue is broadly diffused nowadays, and has spread to the simracing community too, which is a very dangerous thing.

    I say that it is dangerous, because being able of sustaining a confrontation is one of the things that makes us human, and that makes us better. Simple example why, if I am a primitive man trying to cook his freshly caught salmon over by the fire, but I cannot make a fire, it is useful to me if another member of my tribe comes by and says, “Hey, you should maybe use tinder instead of trying to light directly the logs and branches”. I now can eat, which is good, and have way less problems starting a fire, which is great too. However, the way others and ourselves relate to the idea of confronting someone about something is very much important, and is the necessary start for a healthy discussion. Without some prerequisites, there cannot be any talk, so let us round up a few tips:


    1. Be constructive: destroying is easier than building, everybody knows that, and sometimes we all feel the urge to rush out our feelings, resulting in a raw and unfiltered output. Don’t. Just wait, be mindful of what is happening, and think. The person in front of you has a different opinion (hint: which is the better racing sim), but that does not necessarily make him/her an enemy. Put your arguments on the table, and discuss away. Probably at the end of the discussion neither of you will have changed their minds, but surely one if not both might have learned something new. Not perforce about the topic at hand, but also about themselves. Be open about the possibility of discussing your thoughts, accepting criticism or diversity of opinion, and about trying something new based on others advice. Do not let your private life problems get in the way. Everybody has them, so be respectful.​


    2. Be polite: just because, maybe, you know something better, it does not make you automatically a better person. Moreover, if you really do know something more, that means that the other person you are relating to is in a position of disadvantage. Therefore, use this to lift him/her up, not to claim your supposed superiority. If you know how to tackle a specific problem, or have the answer to another simracer’s issue, spend a little time to give assistance to him/her. If a modder used the wrong references, make it known by pointing him/her in the right direction. A community is such only when its members take care of one another, not looking for reasons to fight.


    3. Be informed/informative: again, you may know better, but is that really so? Before jumping to conclusions and pulling the trigger, take some time to think. Is it something exactly as you remember it? Do you really know something or have you just read someone else’s opinion on the subject? Before talking, be sure that what are you going to say is true or agreeable and has a point, and that you have a strong source to back up your assertion. Whenever possible, share your sources, whether is a book, an article, a news piece, an interview or a video. It is important to share sources of knowledge with people. Whether they are actually going to use them or not is their own decision to make, but it is essential that you state them out clearly. Maybe someone else looking at any point in time for indications will happen by and be grateful you left them.


    4. Be open-minded: it might just also happens that you can be drawn to wrong conclusions because of your wrong assumptions or notions about the subject. Do not assume to be in the right. Take into account people creativity or resourcefulness; this is often the case with modders, the most brilliant in particular. They get informed, they study, they look at things by all angles and perspectives and their way of solving an issue might be surprisingly ingenious. What could happen is that while you think that they are in mistake, they are already past the point they need any tip, so try to read everything before jumping right into the discussion.


    5. Read, Read, Read! – This is the most important point of all: read! How many times we see posts giving an answer to something that was already answered a couple posts before, or to things that are not the issue at all or not the point of an article. We tend to skip through text, highlighting only what we believe are the most useful parts. Our mind can trick us! Do not trust it so much. Take your time to read everything through, in detail, maybe more than one time if it is necessary. Do not just rush it through; otherwise, you will end up wasting space and time by giving unnecessary advices and opinions, maybe even misleading other readers. Only if you have a clear picture of what is going on you can effectively respond to the matter at hand in a purposeful way.


    Of course, do not be fooled in thinking that who is writing this article wants to assume the role of the teacher. I am part of the community, so everybody knows how many times I have been at fault too, and I might as well be again in the future as I may be in the present. Take these tips instead as the result of an ongoing learning process. You could be ahead of me, and not need any, but there might be the chance that someone is a bit behind instead and could make use of some. The point is that everyone should have the necessary tools to be a constructive and useful member of this great community we now have, to make it better and improve it further, and I believe anyone can agree on that. Do not pretend that others are wrong, and you are always right.

    Enzo Ferrari once said, «We spend much more time pondering about the harm others can do to us, instead of thinking of the right we can do to them.»

    So, these were my suggestions, what are yours?

    hamilton_vettel_friendly.jpg


    Like what you see here at RaceDepartment? Don't forget to like, subscribe and follow us on social media!

    Instagram
    Youtube
    Twitch
     
    • Like x 39
    • Love x 10
    • Beer x 9
    • Haha x 2
    • Agree x 2
  2. leon_90

    leon_90
    Columnist for RaceDepartment Staff Premium

    Messages:
    626
    Ratings:
    +837
    NOTE:

    'Trolling' and 'Trolls' haven't been mentioned in this article, because they don't deserve any. There is an obvious difference between trolling, which implies having no desire nor interest in being part of a community, and just not participating to discussions the right way.
    So, don't be a troll yourself, and let them stay out of the topic :D
     
    • Beer Beer x 10
    • Like Like x 3
    • Agree Agree x 3
  3. Enthilzha

    Enthilzha

    Messages:
    32
    Ratings:
    +28
    Don't feed the trolls!
     
    • Beer Beer x 4
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Like Like x 2
  4. Ghoults

    Ghoults

    Messages:
    745
    Ratings:
    +347
    Meme pictures are not good constructive responses in discussion.
     
    • Agree x 11
    • Disagree x 2
    • Like x 1
    • Haha x 1
    • Beer x 1
  5. Shaun Clarke

    Shaun Clarke
    Premium

    Messages:
    1,837
    Ratings:
    +3,148
    Ask and enquire in private before accusing in public, as once it is out in public, there is no going back :)
     
    • Agree Agree x 11
    • Beer Beer x 3
    • Like Like x 2
  6. Neils on Wheels

    Neils on Wheels
    Premium

    Messages:
    181
    Ratings:
    +79

    Is trolling that prevalent in these forums? I'm not so sure. I think this website is pretty decent. I think actually trolling is more of an issue when you get fanboys 'cliques' you may get in dedicated forums. Toxicity is quite neutral in here IMO.
     
  7. Celtic Pharaoh

    Celtic Pharaoh
    Premium

    Messages:
    1,791
    Ratings:
    +735

    Sorry but I had to...
     
    • Haha Haha x 3
    • Love Love x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  8. nico80131

    nico80131

    Messages:
    199
    Ratings:
    +79
    Halo sucks
     
    • Haha Haha x 13
  9. snyperal

    snyperal
    Premium

    Messages:
    669
    Ratings:
    +181
    Too long, didn't read.
     
    • Haha Haha x 16
    • Like Like x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Disagree Disagree x 1
  10. pcraenme

    pcraenme
    Premium

    Messages:
    241
    Ratings:
    +120
    Great article.

    I regularly put people on my ignore list temporarily when they are ‘claiming’ certain threads (e.g. Formula 1 threads are constantly overflooded by ‘Max hate’ and ‘Max love’ discussions) or rFactor 2 threads by complaining DLC’s are too expensive... over and over again, in each thread about the subject. That way I don’t get annoyed that much and are ‘triggered’ to response, and make it possibly even worse. It can make following these threads a but difficult sometimes though...
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Disagree Disagree x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  11. David Wright

    David Wright

    Messages:
    934
    Ratings:
    +434
    The way you express yourself is definitely important. If I say "sim X is my favourite sim" I am expressing my opinion, no one can really argue and hopefully they don't feel their favourite sim is being attacked. If I say "sim X is the best sim" I may think I'm saying the same as above - but by saying this people can disagree and may feel their favourite sim is being attacked.
     
    • Like Like x 5
    • Agree Agree x 2
  12. Fat-Alfie

    Fat-Alfie
    David Pemberton Premium

    Messages:
    1,461
    Ratings:
    +2,216
    See #5 :rolleyes:
     
    • Haha Haha x 2
    • Beer Beer x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  13. OptimusRacing

    OptimusRacing

    Messages:
    27
    Ratings:
    +6
    On some matters where it's just so heated I need a fan to cool me down, I'd just say "It is my opinion that I have no opinion"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Medilloni

    Medilloni
    Premium

    Messages:
    274
    Ratings:
    +162
    Last edited: Jan 12, 2019 at 23:09
    • Like Like x 2
    • Haha Haha x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  15. Warren Schembri

    Warren Schembri
    Premium

    Messages:
    721
    Ratings:
    +383
    Remember, opinions are like arseholes. Everybody has one
     
    • Beer x 5
    • Like x 2
    • Love x 2
    • Haha x 2
    • Agree x 2
  16. shadow118

    shadow118

    Messages:
    221
    Ratings:
    +412
    And it's ok to have one, just don't stick it in other people's faces :)
     
    • Haha Haha x 4
    • Beer Beer x 4
    • Like Like x 3
  17. Sky

    Sky
    Premium

    Messages:
    522
    Ratings:
    +227
    nothing wrong with a bit of opinion-play between consenting adults :roflmao:
     
    • Haha Haha x 6
  18. Skython

    Skython

    Messages:
    21
    Ratings:
    +37
    I feel like politics could learn a few things here. :p
     
    • Haha Haha x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  19. Durge Driven

    Durge Driven

    Messages:
    734
    Ratings:
    +280
    Windows simmers, we must be the most opinionated lot going :laugh:

    Do you hear shooters saying " Nah nah ...my game has bigger guns then yours.... ha ha "
     
    • Love Love x 1
  20. Matt Lenart

    Matt Lenart

    Messages:
    52
    Ratings:
    +68
    [​IMG]
     
    • Haha Haha x 2
    • Beer Beer x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.