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How to Cook

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Josh Barton, May 6, 2012.

  1. Im going to admit I am a terrible cook, I barely ever cook and what I do cook is either simple or just plain rubbish :p So I have some culinary questions for those who do know the dark arts.

    The recipe says simmer for 5-10 mins, what the hell is that? I can either make it boil or go cold, I cant seem to find an intermediate tempreture. How do I do that?!
     
  2. Omer Said

    Omer Said
    Weresloth Staff Premium Member

    I'm sure Hiroshi has some great tips on this matter Josh :)

    Me? I know how to prepare an omelette and boil tea, nothing else :redface:
     
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  3. Erik Tveit

    Erik Tveit
    I can haz cookie?

  4. Ole Marius Myrvold

    Ole Marius Myrvold
    JWB 96-13 Staff

    Simmering is boiling on a temperature closer to the point of no-boiling. It is kinda hard if the recipe says that you cannot boil it. However, with something like rice, you heat the water until it boils, then put down the temperature, so it doesn't boil anymore (but stays hot).
    On an oven, with, say 12 different temperatures (1-12, where 12 is the hottest). My guess will be that you will be able to simmer it on around 2-3, rice is usually made on 1-2 :)

    Crikey, this was bloody hard to try to explain on english...
     
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  5. Hiroshi Awazu

    Hiroshi Awazu
    Off Topic Moderator


    Couldn't of explained it better myself:thumbsup:
     

  6. @Omer Said Cant you just 'draw' a great cartoon meal! :D
     
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  7. Omer Said

    Omer Said
    Weresloth Staff Premium Member

    I will try it! A ketchup and mayonezzed paper would be tasty :D
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. I bet it would taste better than any of the stuff I cook ;)
     
    • Like Like x 3
  9. Hiroshi Awazu

    Hiroshi Awazu
    Off Topic Moderator

    • Like Like x 2
  10. Ole Marius Myrvold

    Ole Marius Myrvold
    JWB 96-13 Staff

    btw, i finally remembered a recipe that cannot boil! Bernaise sauce! A fantastic sauce to make from scratch, but a bit hard to get perfect!
     
  11. Hmmm.....This could be an interesting thread, I like cooking but hate doing it just for myself....
    Meanwhile, here's a tip Im always answering to friends....
    "How do I know if an egg is good or bad?"
    Put it in a glass of water, if it floats back up clear off the bottom it's no good.
    Most times it'll just touch bottom but thats OK, there's a little gas pocket in eggs that causes this....

    BLeeK's Basic Bloke Cake.
    (Tea Cake)

    2x cup of flour
    2xEggs (add a 3rd egg if your using a large cup/schooner glass
    1X Table spoon of Butter/margarine
    Half a cup of sugar
    1& a half X Cup of milk

    Switch over on @180degrees C/356F.
    Drop in dry ingredients & eggs & butter & stir, when evenly mixed start adding milk until a nice thick yet 'running' mix is achieved
    (check by holding mixing spoon up, most should run off slowly...)
    Nows the time to add dried fruit or what-not, but NOT chocolate drops if using them-they'll just sink, add them later....
    Grab a cake tin & butter the bottom & sides (inside of course) to help to keep cake from sticking....
    Once tin is buttered add cake mix & if using choc' chips add them now
    Finally, sprinkle a little raw sugar on top & place in oven for 45minutes or until you can stick a knife in & pull it out without any 'wet' mix coming out on it.

    Gently remove cake & allow time to cool off.
    Well done, you needn't buy another cake mix again now! ;)
    Next lesson- How to make a bread & Jam Pudding, but for now, how about a recipe for that Bernaise sauce, it sounds great!
     
    • Like Like x 1
  12. You all make it so complicated.

    1. Go to your nearest supermarket.

    2. Buy (about) 8 frozen pizzas and 5 frozen meals

    3. Stick in microwave for 2 minutes when you get hungry.

    ...and that's food for a week or so :D
     
    • Like Like x 4
  13. True, but it's more expensive & I prefer to cook once & re-heat the rest of the week....;)
     
  14. I tried this once, and the eggs floated....then sunk.....then floated, and bobbed all over the place. Then I got some eggs I knew were fresh and they did the same thing!

    I think the cooking world hates me. Or perhaps I dont care for it much :p
     
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  15. Ole Marius Myrvold

    Ole Marius Myrvold
    JWB 96-13 Staff

    Wey! A recipe as well, too bad that it is a cake. I don't like cakes! :p
     
  16. I was gonna say get a girlfriend or get married but that doesn't always work out........
    My wife's interpretation of BOILED (i.e. cooked in WATER) eggs:
    [​IMG]
    No fancy egg timer needed, they make quite a loud bang when they are ready and parts of them stick to the ceiling, if yours don't stick to the ceiling they may be a tad underdone!.

    and then we have a Microwave meal, one of the simplest things you can cook, comes with a picture showing you the scrummy stuff you are going to be eating and full cooking INSTRUCTIONS.
    [​IMG]
    and yet this is what I was presented with
    [​IMG]
    hmmm tasty.
     
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  17. [​IMG]

    Chocolate Mousse á la Eric:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    "Cookies" (@Erik Tveit):

    [​IMG]
     
  18. U all need some lessons from the Swedish chef

     
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  19. This character used to have me in stitches.
     
  20. Ole Marius Myrvold

    Ole Marius Myrvold
    JWB 96-13 Staff

    @Eric Stranne I'm sure the Mousse was good, but it didn't look too inviting =/
     
    • Like Like x 1